Reflections on Maundy Thursday and Good Friday

Today is Good Friday for us Orthodox. Easter is almost here, but before we get to the Empty Tomb, we must first follow our Lord to the Cross and even descend with Him into Hell. So even though we will be feasting in less than two days' time, it feels like we still have a long way to go.

It reminds me a bit of when I was a student and the end of the semester was approaching. I could never get excited about the winter or summer break that came after the end of semester because I knew I had to get through final exams first. I was always a procrastinator, yet also excessively worried about maintaining a perfect GPA, so final exam week was a very stressful time for me. I couldn't enjoy fantasizing about the upcoming vacation time because part of me wasn't sure I would actually survive finals! Then, when I eventually did make it through finals, the sudden relief of being done with the semester always came as a pleasant shock.

So, I'm not getting excited about Easter... yet.

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Last night was the Great Watch in the Garden, when we commemorate and mystically re-live the night Jesus spent praying in the garden of Gethsemane before His Crucifixion. I was grateful to have the opportunity to pray for about an hour at the Altar of Repose after Mass. My 5-month-old was very cooperative and slept in my arms for most of that time.

The hour I spent at the Altar of Repose was from about 8:45 to 9:45 pm. It was a still, solemn, beautiful hour. On the Altar, the golden Tabernacle containing the Eucharist sat surrounded by flickering candles, which provided the only light to the little chapel. There was darkness beyond the stained glass windows, and I could hear the night noises of the city-- traffic, the occasional siren, voices of pedestrians passing by. All around me in the city, people were going to sleep, or starting the night shift, or having a drink in a bar, as if it were any other night and not the eve of something awful and wondrous. It is lonely to be awake and watchful at night, when it seems that everyone else is asleep or revelling or going about their work. (You can't blame most people for being ignorant of the Orthodox liturgical calendar, but still.)

I thought about Jesus praying in the darkness in Gethsemane, the night noises He must have heard around Him, and His dreadful anticipation of what was about to happen. Only He fully knew what was about to happen, even though he had forewarned His disciples. What a night that must have been.